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The fisherman and the talking frog

 
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RockitRon



Joined: 07 Dec 2006
Posts: 7565

PostPosted: Tue Jul 06, 2010 9:24 pm    Post subject: The fisherman and the talking frog Reply with quote

Have you heard the story of the man in his late 70s who still likes to go fishing?...


He was sitting in his boat the other day when he heard a voice say, 'Pick me up.'

He looked around and couldn't see anyone. He thought he must be dreaming when he heard the voice say again, 'Pick me up.'

He looked in the water and there, floating on the top, was a frog.

The man said, 'Are you talking to me?'

The frog said, 'Yes, I'm talking to you. Pick me up then, kiss me and I'll turn into the most beautiful woman you have ever seen.

I'll make sure that all your friends are envious and jealous because I will be your bride!'

The man looked at the frog for a short time, reached over, picked it up carefully, and placed it in his front pocket.

The frog said, 'What, are you nuts? Didn't you hear what I said? I said kiss me and I will be your beautiful bride.'

The man opened his pocket, looked at the frog and said, 'Nah, at my age I'd rather have a talking frog.'


Smile
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MadeinSurrey



Joined: 11 Dec 2006
Posts: 3130
Location: The Beautiful South

PostPosted: Wed Jul 07, 2010 7:32 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Laughing

Got any more like that Ron?
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Minx



Joined: 09 Dec 2006
Posts: 4088
Location: France/Spain/Peterborough/Tenerife

PostPosted: Wed Jul 07, 2010 7:45 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

There haven't been many jokes recently. Good one Ron. Laughing
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Minx

To err is human, to forgive - canine.
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RockitRon



Joined: 07 Dec 2006
Posts: 7565

PostPosted: Wed Jul 07, 2010 10:55 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

One of my wife's friends sends stuff to me now and then - I'll go weeks without any and then she'll send about thirty, as she did when we were away. Only snag is most of them are racist, political, sexist, or very wooood - I'm not a prude but when it comes to putting something into print for public consumption I just cannot repeat or forward on something I would feel embarassed about in front of friends or family.

Here are a couple of tiny snippets, though:-

A man asked an old American Indian what his wife's name was.

"She's called Five Horses", was the reply.

"That's an unusual name" said the man, "what does it mean?"

The old Indian answered, "It old Indian name. It mean...



NAG! NAG! NAG! NAG! NAG!


***************************************************

This was (allegedly) sold in supermarkets until someone twigged (see bottom of pack)...


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Rachel
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PostPosted: Fri Jul 09, 2010 9:09 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Laughing Laughing I like those.
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RockitRon



Joined: 07 Dec 2006
Posts: 7565

PostPosted: Tue Jul 13, 2010 7:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Another wee chuckle...

Finding a woman sobbing that she had locked her keys in her car, a passing soldier assures her that he can help.

She looks on amazed as he removes his trousers, rolls them into a tight ball and rubs them against the car door.

Magically it opens.

"That's so clever," the woman gasps. "How did you do it?"

"Easy," replies the man, "These are my khakis."

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becky sharp



Joined: 01 Dec 2008
Posts: 5761

PostPosted: Tue Jul 13, 2010 7:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

RockitRon wrote:


[i]A man asked an old American Indian what his wife's name was.

"She's called Five Horses", was the reply.

"That's an unusual name" said the man, "what does it mean?"

The old Indian answered, "It old Indian name. It mean...



NAG! NAG! NAG! NAG! NAG!

Laughing
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